Things ALWAYS Work Out As Planned, Right??

**THIS IS PROBABLY TOO MUCH INFORMATION/GRAPHIC FOR SOME**

So, in September of 2007 we decided it was time to make a baby. (Even though I am Catholic, and my parents would probably/definitely not approve, it was the right timing for us...we knew what we wanted for our lives/family). This would give us a baby in June. PERFECT!!! That is exactly the right time! We would be married, I would be out of school for the summer, and hopefully by then, we would be in a house. We were still living in a one-bedroom apartment. It was a cute little apartment, but only big enough for Jack and I...and not one person more!!

One Monday in early October, my mom and I were out shopping for her mother-of-the-bride dress. We went from Flint, halfway down to Detroit, back up to Troy, and finally all the way up to Frankenmuth!! We finally found the perfect dress at a cute little boutique in the cute little German city!!! The significance of this day, besides getting mom's fabulous dress, is that "aunt flo" visited that day....WHAT????? This wasn't supposed to happen?!?! We should have made a baby. I was so confused. When I decide to do something, I am usually successful....well, not this time.

Jack and I were both pretty disappointed. It felt like there were constant reminders of our failure...I had started the nursing program, and was doing a lot of learning in Hurley Medical Center's School of Nursing building...down in the lower level are about 9 or so pictures of the months of gestation, and how the baby grows inside the mom...seeing those all the time was so sad...i just wanted to be pregnant. My wonderful cousin, Keri, had just had little Lincoln!! How cool, but just another reminder that I didn't get pregnant. And, my BFF, Lindsay was 3 months pregnant with her first baby. Now, I am not stupid. I know that people try for months and years with no successful pregnancies, and that is devastating. I can't imagine how horrible that is. This was just the first month. There was still October. Knowing that we didn't want to have a baby during the school year, we had a window, and the window was getting smaller with each unsuccessful try.

October was here, October went....the last week in October, I was laying in bed, and told Jack that I felt period cramps. Crying, I told him that I didn't know why we weren't better at this. The thermometer was telling us when I was ovulating. I was so sad...Jack told me it would be ok, and not to worry too much.

Wedding Shower!!

My sister and bridesmaids gave me a beautiful wedding shower. It was held at Brickstreet Bar and Grill right by the apartment Jack and I lived at. It seems as though every one of my friends and family attended!! We received more gifts to start our lives together than anyone could ever ask for! It was held on a beautiful September day. My sister got the cake from a fabulous little bakery in Lake Orion (I think).

This Is Where It Gets A Little....

So, because I am Catholic, Jack and I were required to attend marriage preparation classes. Going into this situation we thought we were going to D.I.E.!!! We did NOT want to go to them. We eventually got used to the idea, and started becoming a little more open minded about them.



We went to our first classes at St. Robert's in Flushing. There were many speakers over the weekend. There were many subjects that were covered. The two subjects that stuck out in our minds the most were the communication topics and the family planning topics... ewwww.



We enjoyed learning about how to communicate successfully because we both know too many couples who's relationships suffer because they are not good at talking without getting mad or sassy or pissy or whatever with each other while in a fight/argument. One of the things I remember them talking about involved taking time to listen to and hear what the other has to say. It helps to repeat back in different words to the other person to demonstrate that you hear what they are saying. Staying civil and low-toned helps get each other's points across. I would put money on the fact that we are a better couple because we took this class.

WARNING! MAY BE TOO MUCH INFORMATION FOR SOME PEOPLE!!!!

As far as the family planning class went, we learned tons about what direction we wanted our lives to take. We learned that there are different methods of birth control, if you will, that the Catholic church agrees with. One of the ways is the thermometer method. The thermometer method involves buying a basal thermometer and taking my temperature every single morning before I get out of bed. Simple. The other part to this method involves tracking the temperature on a chart. There are a certain number of days in a month that a woman can conceive a baby. My temperature will tell me what those days are, and what days are days that one can do things that would make a baby!!



We chose this method because we decided that we wanted a baby. We were both getting older. We both decided that we wanted to try and conceive a baby that could be born during the summer (or, at least, NOT during the school year). So, while all wedding plans were coming along smoothly, we decided in June that we would start tracking my temperature/ovulation, and start trying to make a baby in September...and OF COURSE, plans always work out the way they should, right???

Picking The Right Attire!

Around my birthday in '07, my bff, Lindsay, and her hubby, Ira, came up to Michigan from the Atlanta area for a visit. They had lived down there for a couple of years, and didn't get up to Michigan that often. While they were here, I stole Lindsay, Sandy, and my sister Catherine to go to David's Bridal to look at bridesmaids dresses.





I had chosen cocktail-like dresses for a couple of reasons. One: If at all possible, I wanted my bridesmaids to be able to wear them again...some dresses are so hideous that you want to burn it the minute you take it off!! Two: If I would have gone with full length dresses, they would have been all salty and nasty...winter can be a bitch in the mitten state!! I went with black, too. Some people had strong opinions about these choices, but I ignored them...they can do whatever they want at their weddings, why can't I do what I want at mine, right??!! This is the dress I went with, again, it is black, not pink!!





http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Tea-Length-Dress-with-Grosgrain-Ribbon-and-Bow-8585_Bridal-Party-Bridesmaids-All-Bridesmaid-Dresses

The guys were a lot easier to figure out...sort of!! Jack and I went to Men's Warehouse and looked at the different styles and combinations of vests and ties and paisley or stripes and slacks and jackets and shoes and shirts...OMG! Who knew there were all these things to choose from. Ultimately, I feel like we chose a good combo. It was good to have all of that taken care of!!

The Wedding Party!

Picking the few most important people in your life to be a part of one of the most important days of your life is not easy. It's not like you don't know who you want to be a part of such a wonderful moment, it is that you have to narrow down the list...well, at least we had to...also, you have to figure out who you want to suffer through the wedding planning process with you (who is willing to take on the annoying tasks, the financial hardships, and spend the time doing pre-wedding/wedding things)!!!


Jack chose his brother,Lincoln, his three best buddies, Al, Dave, and Lowell, and his brother-in-law, Rod. There were at least 2 or 3 other people he would have chosen had we not had to filter down the choices.


I chose my sister Catherine, my BFF, Lindsay, my cousin, Andrea, my former roomie and great friend, Sandy, and my great friend from Bama, Sarah.


It can be such a pain in the ass for the attendants to be in a wedding, but it really does mean a lot to the bride and groom. We were so grateful to the people that accepted the invitation to be a part of our day!

Jack and I also asked my Aunt Mary Jo, my Uncle Greg, and Jack's niece, Krystal to do some readings during the ceremony. Again, it meant so much to us that they were willing to show their love and generosity to us by doing us such a great favor!

Time To Find The Dress!!!

Since we had decided on a date (December 28, 2007), and we had booked the reception site (Genesys Conference & Banquet Center), and the church (St. John Vianney Catholic Church) was all set to go...what was NEXT, you ask?!?!? THE DRESS!!!



My mom, sister, mom's friend, Mary, and I went to Becker's Bridal. It was told to my mom, if you can't find a dress at Becker's Bridal, you won't find one anywhere...ummmm...that made me super nervous considering this was the first stop we were making. What if we didn't find my dress here, THEN WHAT???





So, off we traveled to Fowler, Michigan. Because I am nowhere near a size 6, it was a little stressful going to find a wedding dress. I wanted something with sleeves, as to not show my flab...not too easy to find!! I also wanted it to be simple. No fuss, no muss. My mom and Mary kept trying to get me to try on dresses with lace all over them...no thanks.





I tried on several dresses, but it was the either the second or third dress I tried on that became 'the one'!! It was sleeveless, with beading at the top. It was off white with a cafe colored strip at the very top and on the bottom. It had simple beading down the back from the waste to the floor that was shaped like little snow flakes...hmmm...see a theme? Winter, snowflakes, Christmas time!!! Things were looking up!


My mom bought my wedding dress, veil, and extra material that day. The extra material was for a shawl or something of the sort, to cover my flubbery arms!! ;)


The day wasn't over! We had a lovely lunch together. We then traveled all the way from Fowler to Troy where we went to Somerset Mall to look at one of their bridal boutiques...let's just say...things were A LOT more expensive there!!!


It was a long (and expensive ~ for my mom) day, but we got a ton accomplished!!! ...We had a date, a church, a reception site, a dress...what's next???? WHO WOULD BE IN OUR WEDDING??!!?!?!?


http://www.beckersbridal.com/site/Home.html

And the wedding planning had begun!!!! ~The Reception Site

After we were officially engaged, my mom and I realized very quickly that we had a lot to do. My mom and I were on the phone one day, and I told her that from here on out until the wedding, there would not be one single phone call/conversation that would not involve a wedding plan! With Jack pushed to the way-side, my mom and I started planning!! ;)


When discussing the date, there were some issues. Neither Jack nor I wanted a long engagement...but we weren't sure we could get a date during the summer. We knew we wanted to get married, but not during the school year...that left May, June, July, and August, and we were already at the end of January...eek...the answer to those dates came quickly when we started looking at reception sites...the event planners were like, really???? You want to book a date WHEN??? Uh, no...people book two and three years in advance...Well, okee dokee...we started looking at dates after the fall semester/Christmas time. There were a couple of dates available at a few sites, so we started pounding the pavement (or the slush...man was the weather bad that day)!


The first place we went was ok. It is owned by my mom's friend. We went to visit, and the people were very friendly and accommodating. There was slight lack of class to the joint, though...the other thing is, it smelled. It smelled of industrial cleaning supplies. It is lovely that the place is clean, but for the love of all things good...the smell was enough to roll the dead over in their graves!


The weather was increasingly getting worse, but we trudged along anyway. We had 3 more appointments to make that day.


The second place was a hall not too far from the church where we would be married. It, too, was ok...one problem with this place is it was scary looking. Another problem is that we had to do all of our own cooking or hire a caterer. UMMM, NOOOO. Not a chance!!


Once again, the roads were getting pretty yucky, but we were PLANNING A WEDDING!! NOTHING WAS STOPPING US!!


The third place was a country club/golf club. The floor plan was completely choppy. There was no way we could fit all of our guests into this choppy crazy floor plan. Another thing about this place is there would still be other members of the club allowed in the area where the reception would be held. The worst thing is that the cake and gifts would have to be placed in the main foyer/entrance area where people (who aren't with the wedding) could totally walk off with the gifts/card box...seriously??? This is where all brides put their gifts and cake??? CRAZINESS...


The last place we went was good stuff. It was near our apartment! I liked the rooms they had to offer. The people were nice. There were no funny smells. They had catering on site. This could be it. My sister met my mom and I at Genesys Banquet and Conference Center after spinning out on the highway. She was very shaken up because after she spun out, a semi-truck was heading straight toward her! She called work and told them she wasn't going to drive all the way down to Auburn Hills in this weather. When she arrived at the hall, she was shaken, but happy to be a part of the planning! She approved of the place, as did my mom! It was definitely more pricey than the other places, but it included more stuff. Mom was willing to help out with the costs...A LOT!!



My parents, Jack, and I were able to go to a tasting of the food that we chose. It was good! There are so many receptions that have gross or nasty or bland food...I definitely wanted the opposite. Ultimately, I think we achieved that!!


http://www.facebook.com/pages/Grand-Blanc-MI/Genesys-Conference-Banquet-Center/128873303791513#!/photo.php?pid=354847&id=128873303791513

Because I am new to this blogging thing, I am not sure how to put links in the blog. I think the link above should take you to an example of a table set up at Genesys Conference & Banquet Center, where we chose to have our reception!