Wow, We Were PREGNANT!!

I remember thinking that I couldn't sit down the same way anymore or get into the car the same way anymore, or do ANYTHING the same way anymore...it was amusing to realize that I sat down more carefully, and I didn't flop myself into the car the way I did the day before I found out I was with child!! I thought I had to be soooo careful!!! I was afraid of "dislodging" my unborn...I soon came to realize that things were going to not be as different as I thought. I could still sit normally and drive normally, etc.


I made a phone call to my OB-GYN's office to tell them that I just took a pregnancy test and that it was positive! The receptionist answered the phone, and I told her who I was. I mentioned that I was pregnant, and that I needed an appointment. She asked me when my last period began, and I told her. She told me that she would schedule an appointment for December 8th...WHAT?????????????? What did she mean, December 8th???? That was more than a month away!!! It was November 5th!!! Little did I know that they don't do your first pre-natal exam until you are about 8 weeks (or so) along...that did not seem fair to me!!


The next few weeks were super interesting and stressful!! I was going to the seamstress for wedding dress fittings. We were starting the house-hunting process. We were keeping our pregnancy a secret....from everyone!! We had decided to not tell our families until Thanksgiving.


Thanksgiving dinner was upon us. Jack's dad, his wife, my parents, and sister were all present. My mom had prepared yet another phenomenal Thanksgiving meal. We were all just about finished with our meals when Jack took my hand under the table. He started to talk about how thankful we both were for all of our parental support with the wedding preparations, and wonderful and helpful they were. He continued with how we hoped that in eight or so months, we could be just as thankful for our new baby!!


The reactions are as follows:
My mom, Karen: jaw dropped, tears, hand and napkin to face.
My sister, Catherine: jaw dropped, tears, big smiles.
My mother-in-law, Cassie: confusion, tears, smiles.
My father-in-law, Joe: smiles, tears (but don't tell anyone), hands in the air in a cheering motion.
My dad, John...........: pursed lips, frown, kind of pissed look on his face.


These were extremely predictable reactions. My mom knew what our plans were about trying to get pregnant. She knew that we wanted to have a baby during the next summer, which meant we had to plan for the beginning of the pregnancy before the wedding. I think she was excited for us. My in-laws...well, I am not sure they knew our plans, but Jack and I had talked about how they would take the surprising news. Jack called his dad's reaction perfectly...he totally said that his dad would do the fist pumps in the air!! I thought that was so funny! We knew that it would take a couple of seconds for the news to sink for Cassie, but that she would also be happy to know that she was going to be an official grandma for the first time!! I knew my sister would be happy and supportive, and would probably have a tear. Then there was my dad...yikes!!! He was NOT happy. He was to the point of angry. I think he was embarrassed that we would get pregnant before our wedding. I think he thought it was inappropriate. I also think that he thought his deacon reputation would be tarnished...all of this I could appreciate and understand. I also know, as I write this three years later, that he wouldn't change things for the world. He told me two days ago (which, just happened to be November 5th, 2010...three years after we found out we were pregnant), that if he knew that "this," pointing to Riley, was going to be the result, he would have never reacted that way...he is a very proud grandpa!!


This was only the beginning of telling people that we were pregnant. We decided (for the most part) not to tell anyone else that we were pregnant until after the wedding. I really wanted to be able to enjoy our wedding without all of the hoopla of baby talk.

Wondering if I am Doing Something Wrong?

After an unsuccessful attempt at getting pregnant, I asked my mom (a nurse) to help me find an OB. She got back to me and suggested one. I said cool, I will make an appointment to make sure everything is in working order. Then I wondered how she found this doctor, so I asked. She said, "I got her name out of the Yellow Pages!" ...great.

So, I made an appointment. She asked me questions, did her assessment, and told me everything was fine from her point of view. I showed her my temperature chart, and confirmed with her that it was accurate; that ovulation was probably occurring as the chart said. She said that it probably was. COOL!!! I was in a much better mood after talking to her! She was very caring and nice!

Here we were, the beginning of November...Monday the 5th, to be exact. Jack was at work, and I was at home watching Discovery Health Channel. On the TV, was a show called Pregnancy For Dummies. PERFECT!!! Exactly what I needed!! I watched and watched...It went through all kinds of stages of ovulation, pregnancy, delivery, and beyond. During a commercial break, I decided to go take a pregnancy test (which I was told not to take them anymore...Jack said that I was jinxing us by peeing on a stick too much)!! Not that I condone hiding things from your spouse, but I could just throw that one in the dumpster, right?!?! So, I peed on a stick for the 90-ka-jillionth time in 2 months....this was becoming an expensive addiction!!

I figured I would have to wait the 2 or 3 minutes, like usual, but as soon as I looked at the enclosed plastic part, it was already turning pink...which meant it was a POSITIVE pregnancy test!!!! omgomgomgomgomgomgomg!!!!!!!!! WHAT??!!!??!?!!? What was I going to do now??? I told Jack that I wouldn't pee on any more sticks, and I did, and it was POSITIVE!!! I guess I would just have to fess up. I gathered my thoughts and called him. He answered. I don't remember exactly what he was saying to me, but whatever it was happened to be a perfect segue into me saying, "you are going to be a daddy!!" He was blown away...couldn't gather his thoughts! He was so excited!! I couldn't wait for the end of his work day!! I needed a hug!!!

Things ALWAYS Work Out As Planned, Right??

**THIS IS PROBABLY TOO MUCH INFORMATION/GRAPHIC FOR SOME**

So, in September of 2007 we decided it was time to make a baby. (Even though I am Catholic, and my parents would probably/definitely not approve, it was the right timing for us...we knew what we wanted for our lives/family). This would give us a baby in June. PERFECT!!! That is exactly the right time! We would be married, I would be out of school for the summer, and hopefully by then, we would be in a house. We were still living in a one-bedroom apartment. It was a cute little apartment, but only big enough for Jack and I...and not one person more!!

One Monday in early October, my mom and I were out shopping for her mother-of-the-bride dress. We went from Flint, halfway down to Detroit, back up to Troy, and finally all the way up to Frankenmuth!! We finally found the perfect dress at a cute little boutique in the cute little German city!!! The significance of this day, besides getting mom's fabulous dress, is that "aunt flo" visited that day....WHAT????? This wasn't supposed to happen?!?! We should have made a baby. I was so confused. When I decide to do something, I am usually successful....well, not this time.

Jack and I were both pretty disappointed. It felt like there were constant reminders of our failure...I had started the nursing program, and was doing a lot of learning in Hurley Medical Center's School of Nursing building...down in the lower level are about 9 or so pictures of the months of gestation, and how the baby grows inside the mom...seeing those all the time was so sad...i just wanted to be pregnant. My wonderful cousin, Keri, had just had little Lincoln!! How cool, but just another reminder that I didn't get pregnant. And, my BFF, Lindsay was 3 months pregnant with her first baby. Now, I am not stupid. I know that people try for months and years with no successful pregnancies, and that is devastating. I can't imagine how horrible that is. This was just the first month. There was still October. Knowing that we didn't want to have a baby during the school year, we had a window, and the window was getting smaller with each unsuccessful try.

October was here, October went....the last week in October, I was laying in bed, and told Jack that I felt period cramps. Crying, I told him that I didn't know why we weren't better at this. The thermometer was telling us when I was ovulating. I was so sad...Jack told me it would be ok, and not to worry too much.